Unexpected

One of the things about doing the work that I do - living internationally and all, travelling around from place to place - is that you meet a lot of people. And each person has a purpose. Some, they are there to entertain you just for an evening. Some are there to give you company while you are in that location. Some will be long term friends (although this is more difficult and less likely). 

And some are unexpected. As in, you meet for a night or two, have great discussions and then move on, thinking that you will never see them again. 

Fast forward to this week, when one such person, has re-entered my life for the 3rd time...unexpectedly.

I first met T on Christmas Day 2010, in Haiti. I had just arrived in country, didn't know many people, so when I was invited by some colleagues to a Christmas dinner at another NGO house, I of course accepted. It's kinda lonely spending Christmas by yourself... 

When I arrived, I noticed T - he's kinda hard to miss, with big eyes, big arms, and a big Cockney accent. We chatted a bit about life, living in Haiti and such and then moved on. 

I think we were all out on New Year's eve too. 

I next met T in August of 2012 - over a year and a half later. He was living with a good friend of mine in Haiti, working for another NGO. And even though I had been over to my friend's house many times and had even talked with him on the phone, I had never met his roommate, T. So on my friend's last night, we all went for leaving drinks at their favourite place. 

As soon as I walked in the restaurant, I knew I had known T, but neither of us could remember from where...it was only on a random discussion around Christmases spent abroad that BAM! I remembered...

And that was the second time we met. I never saw him again in Haiti. 

Now, T, my good friend and I are all working for the same NGO. T works in Malawi (just moved), my friend, B, lives in Ireland, and I am in Kenya. So, even though that may bring us a little closer together professionally, the likelihood of all 3 of us being in the same place at the same time was slim-to-none. 

Or so we thought. 

We took a lot of photos. This was the best one.

This past week, all 3 of us were in Nairobi together. Both T and B had booked last minute trips to/through Nairobi for completely different reasons. And I live here, of course. 

Let's just say that a fun night was had, reminiscing and laughing and making fun of each other.

I love it when life throws unexpected things your way. Like friends who unexpectedly move from someone who you barely remembered to someone who you will probably go visit at some point. 

Degrees of Separation

They say that there are an average of 6 degrees of separation between any individual on the planet. 

Via

In fact, in looking for a photo, I discovered that social scientist Stanley Milgram (of the infamous Obedience to Authority experiment) tested this theory as well, in what he called the small world theory. He found that between any individual and some other random individual, there is an average of 5 people in between. Hence, the 6 degrees of separation. 

In the NGO world though, even though it is a world that spans the globe, it is much smaller. 

Some might argue it is too small. 

***

A few weeks ago a logistician friend of mine in Ireland had to conduct a logs induction for 2 people he had never met before - never even heard of. A man and a woman who were being deployed to 2 separate countries shortly after that. Indeed, the man and the woman being inducted had not met, nor heard of each other either. 

So the scene is set - 3 complete strangers sitting in a room together talking about logistics.

Now, this friend of mine is very chatty, so of course he started talking with these 2 about their past experience, where they had been, where they are going, what they will do there... 

And it is in this process that he discovers that they all have one thing in common. 

ME. 

(ok, and my old housemate in Haiti too - so 2 things in common)

Yes, sitting in that room were 3 people who had never met nor had any knowledge of the other peoples' existence, yet all 3 of them were acquainted (professionally or otherwise) to me. 

6 degrees of separation? 

Try 2...

(oh, and apparently they all had a great laugh about it then, and then my loggie friend and I had a great laugh about it afterwards)

And that's not the first time that has happened...nor will it be the last...

An Open Letter...

"Even though we've changed and we're all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will ever change so much to the point where we're not all still friends."

Dear Best Friends,


I just wanted to tell you all something - I miss you. I miss our laughs; I miss our tears; I miss our moments that we were so frustrated by at the time that are now one of our most cherished moments (Big Sur?); I miss our inside jokes (sword?); I miss our dances (82?); I miss our paintings; I miss our breakfasts, lunches and dinners together; I miss our drinks; I miss our crazies; I miss everything that we had.


Haiti is teaching me a lot. It is teaching me a lot about work; it is teaching me a lot about humanitarianism. Most of all though, it is teaching me about friendship and relationships and what it means to find people who you are able to be yourself with - support you, frustrate you, encourage you, and most of all who love you unconditionally. People like you are not easy to find. 


People like you remind me that there is life outside of here, and that even if things are difficult here that there are people like you in the world who I can not see for years, and then pick up with as if we had never left. 


You are always in my heart. And until I see you again, know that I love you. And that in you, I find strength. In you, I find courage. In you, I remember how to love. 


You are everything to me. 


For all of you, from New Zealand to Australia to Singapore to India to Italy to the UK to the US to whatever country you are heading to next, I love you. 


And I will always be there for you when you need.


Forever,
Ang

Back to Reality

Well, once again I am here. In a New York Airport Hotel. Thankfully, NOT stuck this time...as far as I am aware of...yet. I am, once again, on my way to Haiti - this time knowing a bit more what to expect, knowing the people that are there, and being really excited for the challenge that lies ahead.


But before all that happens, I thought I would give a quick update of the last 2 and a half weeks...which were awesome!


My arrival into the UK was marked with the surrealism, somewhat hinted at in the last post, of having been gone for 3 months and returning to a place I loved, but was not expecting to see for a while. You might even say I had a minor identity crisis...but only minor. Being surrounded by people I loved and a home that I knew made me able to adjust back in within days. 


And what days those were - days of surprised faces, exclamations, the Lion King in the West End, visits with professors, drinks on the river Thames, and dinners with the flatmates. Oh, and shopping. Can't forget that essential item.


The highlight of my trip though - barring the BF and our London fam - was a trip to the Scottish Highlands in the second week. I am not exaggerating when I place the Highlands at an 8 on a scale of 10. Mountains, lochs, snow, rivers, sea, waterfalls, sheep, highland cattle, remote islands, whisky, castles, pubs, and great company - all words that describe this trip. But I will let some of the photos do the talking. 

Loch Ness

What I Call: Mirror Lake

What a View!

Not a Soul in Sight!

Seaside Village

Scottish Highlands are highly recommended. And it was great and much needed to spend some time with just the BF. 


I came back from Scotland, super excited and ready to get back to Haiti. But I still did not have flights booked. Ha! Well, it actually worked out best. The BF, who is moving back to Oz via a 5-day visit to LA, left the same day - same airline, same terminal. And our flights were within 10 minutes of each other! While that just prolonged the teary goodbyes, at least we were able to spend our last few days, full of friends, laughter and drinks, up to the last few moments together. It will be about 4 months before I see him next and this is going to be difficult and long. TGFS - Thank God for Skype!


Before I get lost in my contemplation of the end of my London era, and a return to reality, I need to head to bed. But before I go, I just want to put out how thankful I am for my family in the UK and for all the times we had together. See you in Oz, dear friends! 

The Cat's out of the Bag

I kept this a secret for so long. And let me tell you, it was hard. Very hard.


Are you ready? Are you? Are you?

Hello London. Nice to see you again!


That's right folks. I am back. Just for a short visit in between contracts. But I am here. To see all of you!


I'll be here for the next 2 weeks, minus a short visit to the Scottish Highlands.


Give me a call at my old UK number to hang out!!!

The Strength Within

I had a dream last night that I was on a cruise ship with a whole bunch of friends, but most of the time I was alone. Everywhere I went, I was either too late or people were doing something else without me. I felt forgotten.

I think this is very indicative of my life right now. Humanitarian work is tough. It is cut-throat. And at the end of the day, at the end of the contract, you have made a lot of aquaintances, a lot of colleagues, but you all will leave. I will leave. 

I don't mean to sound melodramatic about it all. To be honest, I somewhat have a peace about it all. But for everyone who glamourises humanitarian work as 'saving the world' or so active and exciting, let me tell you. If you want this sort of life, be prepared to be alone. Be prepared to trust no one. Be prepared to rely only on yourself. 

There are 2 weeks left in my contract. And all I have to say is "WHAAATTTT??????" It went by so quickly! Now this does not necessarily mean I am leaving Haiti. But is does mean that I have to explore what my options are. I think I would love to stay here (most of the time), and right now, that is what I am pursuing. My French is just getting somewhat manageable, I am beginning to develop those strong working relationships. 

But at the same time, there is a part of me that feels like I should go. There is a part of me that is tired of not being supported, of constantly having to fight for my right to have some sort of control in what I do professionally. I am tired. I need R&R. 

There are talks about a new role developing. It's a 6-week long contract, which is only like that as a 'trial' period, and hopefully there will be room and budget for me to continue. If not, who knows. 

One other thing about humanitarian work - be prepared for your entire life to be one massive question mark. Consistently. It is consistently inconsistent. That is the guarantee.

Obviously, by this post, you can tell that there are a lot of things going on. A lot of things that I cannot share here. But, what has Haiti done to me and for me in the last 6-weeks? It has changed me. It made my work style different. It has solidified the strength that I always knew was in me. If I can make it through this on top, I can do anything. And making it on top is what I fully intend to do. 

In the meantime, let me leave you with some recent photos...

This is the future of Haiti:

Beach Days...

I just returned from another lovely beach trip. And let me tell you, it was great! So great! Better than expected. I mean, I expected to have a really good time and get to hang out with some really awesome people, but it was even better than that. Let me tell you why...

*Photos taken from last Haitian Beach trip. Forgot my camera this time!

The outing was planned as a farewell to one of our colleagues, R. He is moving home tomorrow. I actually had just met him about a week or so ago. You see, I was driving home from the office and he lives in one of the teamhouses just around the corner from me. It was maybe a few days after I had started driving in Haiti - driving a landcruiser on hills that actually need 4-wheel drive - and I was not feeling confident yet. So, I am 'assigned' to drive this guy, R, home, which is down a massive hill. First off, he started by joking that he lived at my house...almost fooled me for a bit (hey, you never know...), but it was soon established that I was the crazier of the bunch, as I sweated profusely, unable to do the introductory chitchat driving down this hill. So, when I found out the farewell was for him, I laughed and said, well at least I can make him see that I am not that silly (even though we all know I am actually quite silly). 


We went to Moulin-sur-Mer, a resort just around the corner from the one I went to on New Year's Day. It was much nicer than the other one, although smaller. Perfect for the 22 or so of us who carpooled out there for a weekend of enjoyment.


And enjoying it was. We started the day off too early, arriving at the beach at around 10am. Checked in, and headed straight down to the beach! The water was the same warm, clear blue Haitian water as usual and was perfect for tossing on some snorkel gear and heading out to the reef nearby! Which was exactly what happened. 

***

Side note: out of the 22 of us, we figure we have most of the globe represented - North America (I was 1 of 2!), Europe, Middle East, South Asia, Australia, Haiti, and of course the Africans. Since R is from East Africa, there were loads of representation covering the span of Africa, from East to West to South. I loved the diversity and let me tell you, lots of languages conversed in and lots of laughter was shared. What a great group to be a part of!

***

*Moulin-sure-Mer is just around the corner from that point.

While I was out snorkeling, lots of activity was taking place towards the shore. You see, many Africans cannot swim. It has a lot to do with lack of access to a pool or coast, not being able to afford lessons, and just a lack of general cultural emphasis on it, such as in the States or Australia. So the few of us who could swim were 'designated teachers' showing friends how to float, kick, use their arms and actually just relax in the water. And let me tell you - some hilarious moments appeared. Such as when a housemate was lifting a colleague by his belly, trying to get him to kick and use his arms at the same time.

My major...achievement?... for the day included getting stung by a jellyfish. Twice. The first time, I didn't realise that was what happened, so I just shook it off and continued on my merry snorkeling day. The second time was just as I was heading back into shore, and I must have caught it as I was stroking. My entire forearm was covered. And it stung. A little at first, then more and more and more. And then welts started to appear! I was recommended by the staff to put some lime on it and use some ice. That helped, and so did time. I still have some splotches on my skin, but am none the worse for the wear. Special thanks goes to my housemate, who kindly volunteered to 'open his shop' and pee on my sting. I politely replied - thanks, but no thanks. The pain is not THAT bad!

Our afternoon was rounded out by lunch, resting, kayaking, laughing, drinking, more swimming lessons, and jumping on one of those massive floating water trampolines. We headed to the rooms soon after to shower, change and get ready for the evening's festivities. 

We ate dinner on a concrete platform in the middle of the water, listening to music, drinking beers, looking at the amazing stars (I saw the moon-set in the water for the first time!!!) and then...the dancing. Oh, the dancing. Myself and another colleague were placed in charge of running the 'game of the evening'. Which involved a 3-legged dance competition. What laughter! Of course this led to much more dancing until the late hours of the evening. Nothing beats a night of dancing with friends and colleagues to electric, hip-hop, reggae, African, and latin beats, followed by a late night swim and falling asleep under the shooting stars. Well, this is true, but I didn't actually mean to fall asleep under the stars!!! Whoops!!!

Today, after breakfast, our morning of hilarity continued with water fights, dancing in the ocean, more trampoline jumping, more kayaking and snorkeling, and building a 3-man totem pole. Or more accurately, a man-woman (me)-woman structure. Can't wait to see the pics!

Now, at home, working for the evening, I am just reminiscent of an excellent time, with excellent people and the desire to share experiences like this more often. Haiti, you are definitely on my good side today!

A Little Bit Tanner; More at Home

Well, it's been a while since I have sent an update and oh what a while it has been... I last left you on New Year's Eve. Well since then, I have (as the blog title describes) gotten a little bit tanner and am more at home...in many senses of the word. 

But first the tan part. For New Year's Eve, I desperately wanted to get out of PaP and go to the beach. However, this was not to be so, as security was only cleared New Year's eve day. However our curfew was extended to 2am, thankfully (should get more into the curfew stuff in another post, methinks). So, NYE was spent with most of WV (and a little bit of Concern Worldwide) at 2 separate clubs. We went to the first one because we did not want to go to the 'same old, same old' (not that any of it is old for me yet haha). They had a live band, which the idea of sounded good. When said band turned out to be reggae, mj included, we all non-reggae lovers decided that 'same old same old' was good enough for us. So off to the dance club we headed and dance we did. It was a great night, ending at a teeny-weeny bit past curfew (shhh). 

However New Year's Day was not spent sleeping till all hours of the afternoon like normal people. There was a small protest scheduled to take place at 10am, so a small group of us decided to get out of town at 9am and head to the beach overnight. And it was so lovely. New Years was spent swimming in the warm Caribbean water, drinking rum slushies while lounging on the beach. We were all still exhausted from NYE, so we called it a night early after a few games of Texas Hold'Em, waking up early enough for a long walk on the beach in the cool morning air. Sunday, the day after, was spent lounging by the pool, swimming laps, playing beach volleyball and of course the warm turquoise water called to me for another swim as well. All home in time to fit in some work on Sunday evening. What a great weekend. 

The reason I wanted to fit in some work on Sunday night was because this week was the first full week back in the office and I knew it would be a busy one. But a good one. The week was spent in front of a laptop, networking with people I had either not met before, or people who had been gone over Christmas break. And I started to realise that coming when I did, post-lockdown, pre-Christmas, prevented me from getting into my groove. I was lonely; I displayed a lack of motivation for my job and an agressiveness for all other jobs which was unlike me; I think I was not completely myself. 

That is now changing. I am getting into the groove at work and discovering that I actually really enjoy being a knowledge manager. I just moved into my own house today, shared with 4 other WV colleagues. It is a new house - well, new to WV - and is so massive, it has 3 dining rooms. Seriously. But I have my own room (which is awesome btw) and am now getting into the groove. I am so glad I had that time over Christmas, but am so glad its past as well.

Haiti is looking to be a great time:

- Hikes are planned (well, more hikes...an 8k walk at 6:30am is actually quite spectacular)

- Housewarming party anyone?

- A weekend trip to Turks & Caicos is in the works in a few weeks time...

Loving Haiti this week and so glad that I am. 

Joyeux Noel et Bonne Année

Well, Christmas has come and went. And having no Christmas decorations or Christmas tree or presents, ore really much of any tradition, it did not really feel like Christmas around here. I spent 1 night last week making Christmas trees out of green construction paper, and that was the best I could do - especially since I am now in this apartment - staying in someone else's room - by myself. So far it has not been too lonely, but I think that has a lot to do with the fact that it was Christmas and there were lots of events going on.


But let me start off with what happened this week for me. It was a short work week - the office was 'closed' starting from Thursday - I still went in though. Better than working from home by myself. At least there is some sort of human interaction.


However, I realised shortly into it that it is going to be very difficult for me to do my job this week. We are 'closed' through the 2nd now, and much of the work I need to do, I need other people around for. Well, at least now I am able to throw out my arm and say "Hey! I am available! Give me something to do!"


And in the meantime, socializing and celebrating Christmas has been the task at hand. We had a Christmas party on the rooftop on Christmas eve for all the expats still in town - about 30 of us. And it was a success. I somehow ended up on the planning committee, organising decorations and food set up. Also went grocery shopping with others as well. It was a lot of fun, but a lot of work. All the leftover food is now left at my apartment - I don't know what to do with it all! It's going to go bad!


But anyway, we celebrated Christmas in typical expat style - lots of dancing and beer. I thoroughly enjoyed it, but had moments of loneliness and missing my CA family and my London family. Had to come downstairs to make some Skype calls to the bf - nothing says Merry Christmas like having someone wake you up in the middle of the night to tell you to get on Skype! haha. :P


But the night ended late, and I had all these grandiose plans to make pancakes for a small group of friends here on Christmas am, but that didn't happen. Oh well. Think it had a lot to do with skyping the fam, doing some of our traditions through Skype - like reading the Christmas story - and also skyping the London fam. They were having a massive meal at my old house for 17 of them! I got passed around and told everyone I missed them. :(


I went with a few friends here to a local pool on Christmas day - it didn't work out very well though because it was late afternoon by the time we got there and it was actually quite cool. Still no tan on my arms. Darn. But afterwards was Christmas dinner at another NGOs house. And let me tell you - this felt like Christmas. They had all the traditional - turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, stuffing, and the best cranberry sauce I have ever had! And again, in true expat style, we ended the night at a nightclub dancing away. Well, we didn't stay too late this time.


Christmas here didn't really feel like it though, as I said at the beginning. It almost feels like you go through the motions because its what you are told to do. Honestly, if we hadn't had the parties, I would have probably completely forgotten about it. Loneliness does set in, but I think that has a lot to do with the fact that I am not staying at a house of my own and I am here by myself.


All I can say is that I am excited for this work week. Being productive is the best way to make the time go by.


I hope your Christmases were excellent and filled with lots of close family and friends. That truly is the way to spend the day. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. xx