Slainte Ireland

So, in the last few months, I have spent an unexpected amount of time in Ireland. As in, I now feel like I know Dublin as home, have a pub where the bar staff know my name, can make recommendations as a local not a tourist, have the places that have a story behind it that we can keep revisiting, and even attended an Irish Catholic mass (oh Lordy, that Rosary!)... Well, I work for an Irish NGO even. 

Oh and then there's the time that I sang in a pub. In front of people. 

My choice of song? Well, between all the pressure of choosing, not being able to remember anything and what just pops out of my head, I ended up with...

The American National Anthem. 

Seriously. I even stood with my hand on my heart.

And then the families, cousins, aunts and uncles...well, they laughed. And joined in. Some even stood up with me.

And the best part?

They knew all the words too :)

Well, anyway, since I have spent so much time there, and since I have come to love it like a home and since I think it will be a while before we get another visit in, I am sharing some photos that I took over my time there. 

It really is a gorgeous country. 

Go visit if you can. 

Glendalough, Wicklow

Glendalough, Wicklow

Glendalough, Wicklow

I like to call it the land of Rainbows

Eastern Coast, just one hour south of Dublin

It was spring when I was last there.

Well, we would call it Spring...Irish call it Summer. And then we got kicked off the grass. 

Just your average Saturday afternoon

Hiking Croagh Patrick, Co. Mayo (West of Ireland)

All I see here are TAN LEGS!!! (which don't exist anymore)

Westport, Co. Mayo

Westport, Co. Mayo

Westport House, Co. Mayo (British, not Irish though... reminds some (i.e. me) of Mr. Darcy

Howth, Co. Dublin (North end of the DART)

When in...Dublin...at an Ireland Six Nations rugby game...at a pub

Slainte, Ireland. And thanks for all the memories.

Posterity

Yep, that's my name right there in the middle of the page. Proud moment. 

Article can be found here:
http://www.trust.org/alertnet/blogs/kenya-election-diary/victory-without-victims-building-peace-in-kenyas-nakuru-valley/

and here:
http://www.goal.ie/NewsDetails/241

Comfort (not the ship)

I have to admit something. Something that I have tried to hide and suppress for quite some time now. But it is time to get it out in the open. To admit. To take action against it. 

I have been lonely here in Kenya. Quite a bit actually. And that is because making friends here is tough. Tougher than anticipated; tougher than I was prepared for. 

I have heard it said multiple times here - Nairobi is a place for families, for couples, for people wanting to settle down and have a normal life. And with a normal life comes routine. And with routine comes habits. And with each of those, the people who appear in your life become consistent. And with consistency, one gets comfort. 

And it's hard to get out of one's comfort zone. And it's hard to get into others. 

Hence, that is where I am. Not yet settled, not yet in a routine, not yet in a comfort zone. 
(although, I ask myself, do I really want all that, but that is a thought for another time and day)

And so, I get lonely. I have acquaintances, yes. I have a pretty cool (but very hardworking, i.e. never here) housemate, yes. And I even have people from past experiences who I consider myself close to here. 

But the loneliness reappears. Often. 

I realised just now though. In all the times I have moved abroad, it has always been extremely easy. 

In the UK - I met my boyfriend-at-the-time 2 weeks after I arrived. With him, came an entire group of awesome friends. That I hung out with regularly while we were all still living in London.

In Haiti (round 1) - I was with a large NGO that had many expats, all who were up for going out. All one really had to do was find out where the party or event was and show up. 

In Haiti (round 2) - I lived the entire year with the best housemate, friend, socialiser one could ask for. With that built in, who could ask for more? Even though there was more - Haiti is one of the most inclusive places I have ever experienced - perhaps because it is so small. Everyone was always welcome. 

I have a friend in Nakuru. With whom I can only speak Kiswahili.

Nairobi is giving me new challenges though. I have to make an effort this time. I have to be patient this time. And I have to allow myself to be ok with the loneliness that will come. Because it will not last. 

Thank God for that. 

I may not yet be yearning for the 'settling down' that many come to Nairobi for. But I take comfort in knowing that I am finally getting the true experience to moving to the unknown. Both the positives and the negatives. 

It is all a part of life. 

2 months on

It has been almost 2 months since my arrival here in Nairobi. 

I think I am almost at the stage where I am stopping to compare everything with Haiti. 

At first, of course, it was an easy thing to do - both developing countries, both have struggles and challenges, both have a large expat community. 

Gorgeous Kenya - the Great Rift Valley

But culturally, the similarities stop. Kenyans are not Haitians. Yes, both are politically informed and politically motivated. But they are each their own.

Heck, every individual is each their own. 

I left Haiti in early December 2012. It was time to go. I was sad of course; I knew I would miss it (I still miss aspects of it), but I also knew that it was time for something new - a new experience, a new scene. 

So, Kenya it turned out to be. 

And every day, I know this is the right place for me at this moment. It's kinda awesome to have that feeling. 

Now, 2 months in - the majority of which we have been restricted to Nairobi due to the ongoing elections, and I am starting to feel more comfortable in my role, more comfortable in my house, more comfortable with friends. 

It is still a work in progress - what I like to call growing pains - but Nairobi is becoming home. And its not a bad home, to be sure. 

Mornings in Hibernation

We have been in 'hibernation' ...

** Side note - 

Someone asked me this week what is the difference between hibernation and lockdown. 
My best response was that when we are in lockdown serious s*** is going on outside - we have to stay inside to be safe. Hibernation is more to do with monitoring the situation from a known location to see what happens. 
Anyway, I think that's the difference. 

Now. Back to today's main programming.

We have been in 'hibernation' now pretty much all week. Yesterday we went into the office. Wednesday, we were allowed to leave the premises. Which I did just because I could. 

But since it has now been almost 7 days straight of being home (counting the weekend), I have gotten myself into a pretty nice habit. 

Mornings. 

my 'office' 

In the mornings, I stay in my pjs for as long as I can. I wake up early while it is still cool, get myself a yummy Kenyan coffee, open my computer and read the news. And start working. Emails and writing and such. 

And eventually, say around 11am, I will get myself together, get dressed, get some food and move to my desk. And continue working. 

This is going to be a difficult habit to give up when we head back into the office. 

Degrees of Separation

They say that there are an average of 6 degrees of separation between any individual on the planet. 

Via

In fact, in looking for a photo, I discovered that social scientist Stanley Milgram (of the infamous Obedience to Authority experiment) tested this theory as well, in what he called the small world theory. He found that between any individual and some other random individual, there is an average of 5 people in between. Hence, the 6 degrees of separation. 

In the NGO world though, even though it is a world that spans the globe, it is much smaller. 

Some might argue it is too small. 

***

A few weeks ago a logistician friend of mine in Ireland had to conduct a logs induction for 2 people he had never met before - never even heard of. A man and a woman who were being deployed to 2 separate countries shortly after that. Indeed, the man and the woman being inducted had not met, nor heard of each other either. 

So the scene is set - 3 complete strangers sitting in a room together talking about logistics.

Now, this friend of mine is very chatty, so of course he started talking with these 2 about their past experience, where they had been, where they are going, what they will do there... 

And it is in this process that he discovers that they all have one thing in common. 

ME. 

(ok, and my old housemate in Haiti too - so 2 things in common)

Yes, sitting in that room were 3 people who had never met nor had any knowledge of the other peoples' existence, yet all 3 of them were acquainted (professionally or otherwise) to me. 

6 degrees of separation? 

Try 2...

(oh, and apparently they all had a great laugh about it then, and then my loggie friend and I had a great laugh about it afterwards)

And that's not the first time that has happened...nor will it be the last...

Shameless Self-Promotion

I don't really like to post what organisation I am working for here in this space. For a few reasons. 

1) All the opinions here are my own and I don't want them to be responsible for them coming back the organisation I work for. 

2) If you know the organisation I work for, you can easily find me. And that's kinda creepy. VERY creepy actually. 

3) Well, mostly just those 2 reasons. 

BUUUTTTTT.... There always comes a time to break the rules. Especially when self-promotion is involved. 

So - go read the blog I wrote for my current organisation about the Kenya elections. Much more exciting than the blog I wrote yesterday about being in lockdown. 

It's here: http://www.goal.ie/NewsDetails/223

Cool. 

Big Brother

Today is election day in Kenya. A day where Kenyan citizens go to the polls and cast their ballots for their chosen presidential candidates (amongst others).

Today is also day 1 of me not being able to go out of doors. 

Lock-down. 

My organisation has placed expats under lock-down more on a just-in-case basis. Just-in-case something happens like last time (post-election violence), just-in-case we need to be gotten a hold of, just-so-we-know-where-you-are. 

It's not a bad plan really - because nothing is likely to happen, at least not today or tomorrow, and hey who wouldn't normally welcome a free day to stay home?

Yeah, except it's that same-old, same-old rule...when someone says you can't do something, what do you want to do, but do it?

And now the stir crazy-ness steps in. My housemate and I feel like we are in an episode of Big Brother, with nothing to entertain us (really there is - tv, internet, Skype, exercise...), nothing to do (ok, we are working from home), and the only option is random bursts of energy (on my part by jumping up and down) or random acts (on his part - throwing an empty coke bottle in the air). 

And then of course there is wine. And it is after 5pm here. So I have chosen wine. 

Big brother ain't got nothing on me yet. But let's see what tomorrow brings...

I didn't know what photo to put here.
And then I found this cute one of me in my Dad's old shirt that says Go Climb a Glacier.
And climbing a glacier sounds awesome right now.
Compared to sitting on the couch. So there's the logic.

Gonna Take Me a Lot to Drag Me Away From You

I don't remember the last time I wrote here. It's been a while, I know. And there have been a lot of changes. Well, not lots. But some really big ones.

More specifically, I have moved. 

From here:

This would be Haiti (on an awesome hike from Furcy to Jacmel)

To here:

From - the baby elephant orphanage in Nairobi, Kenya

Via almost 2 months spent here:

the Emerald Isle of Eire (aka Ireland)

So, yeah... that kept me kinda busy. So sorry for not writing in ages. I'll catch up over the next little while to share what happened in these locations and why Kenya is the place to be at the moment. 

(ok ok, just a little taster...

Job ended in Haiti, no option or desire to renew;

Had a free place to stay in Ireland for December;

Went back for January and orientation with the new job

in Kenya. Where I now live)

Details to come...

And bonus points to whoever first gets where the title of this post came from.

Fool Me Twice, Shame on Me

The past 3 weeks or so have been a roller coaster, to say the least. As I commented here, before Isaac came, I was exhausted. There had been a lot happening in life, I was getting tired, emotional, and was quite close to burnout, I expect. But Isaac rejuvenated me enough to get me here to today. 

And today, I am exhausted again. Impatient, short with people, curt, and just need to sleep. 

But you look at my past 3 weeks, though, you would understand. 

3 weeks ago, we had our security measures increased dramatically due to an increase in international female kidnappings. Now, our curfew is at 10:30pm, we have drivers all the time, cannot walk by ourselves anywhere, and have to text and discuss our movements down to the nth degree. When I am in Leogane, where I don't really know anyone, after the office closes, my only option is to stay in the house. Seemingly under house arrest. Oh, and this is only for women...and ANYONE who knows me would know how I feel about that.

Oh, and around that time, a great majority of our management staff were out of the country, which means there was an increased workload on us all around. 

2 weeks ago, we had a tropical storm hit Haiti, during which I was stuck in the house in Leogane. The storm caused damage in our operational areas, which means that I was out on the field doing assessments and planning a response. 

1 week ago, I initiated a more in-depth assessment, while also trying to finalise evaluations, donor reporting, finishing up reports that others never finished, manage consultants, and work with the rest of my colleagues to make the right decisions around our response. While it was great and exciting, it was exhausting. By Sunday, I was beat and needed a day at the beach to recover. 

And then this weekend happened. I had left most of my stuff in Leogane, because I knew I was going to be back there, come Monday, for the week. And I knew I would not need much over the weekend. So, hey, why not make life easier and only bring the essential items back with me (thankfully,  my passport and ipod were on that list)? 

And then the house was broken into on Friday night, any room which was open (mine included) was gone through and things were taken. Including my bag of clothes. With probably about 3/4 of the clothes I wear regularly here, underwear included. I didn't know about this until this morning, when I got to Leogane, walked into my room and the bag was gone. No hope of finding anything. Well, my trainers were recovered in the banana plantation out back. Woo. Thanks, thieves. 

So, I am back to being exhausted, frustrated yet slightly emotionless. I am ready for a break. Haiti can get to you, sometimes - as I wrote here - it can provide you with some interesting adventures. My friend today told me, well, at least you have a story... 

Yes. Haiti has provided me with stories. More stories than I could probably ever share. 

But they are not always the best stories. They are stories that are tiring, frustrating, where you just want to escape. 

Am I a fool for staying? Or maybe I just need an escape for a short while.